Damn Spirk
by MirrorFlower and DarkWind
Summary: Side story to Songs of an. Bones wakes up and no one is around except for two people and he keeps running into them in the worst possible ways!


**T'Slash: **Well this one-shot has been planed for _months_! Every since I decided to throw in Be Prepared in the Drunk lineup this story has been sitting patiently waiting for the truth of those chapters to come out. So now that it has this can be shown, this is what happened after Bones went to bed the night after the party. I hope you all enjoy this story, no idea how it will turn out but it should be fun.

**Disclaimer: **Do not own if I did…well…I don't know really.

**Damn Spirk**

"Ugh, my head," McCoy grumbled, sitting up in bed, his head held between both hands as he tried to will the pounding away. "What in Gods name happened?" McCoy looked back over the night, trying to figure out where the pain could have come from. _It couldn't be the booze I didn't get that drunk, _McCoy thought, the pain slowly receding.

"Whatever, it doesn't matter," he mutters pulling himself out of bed, smirking as he remembered Spock carrying Jim off the previous night. "At least the plan worked, who knew those three could actually help those idiots."

"Doctor McCoy, you are needed in Sickbay immediately," the intercom chirped with Spock's voice, slightly worried.

_Fuck! What did Jim do this time? _McCoy thought, slamming the intercom button. "What did the idiot do this time Mr. Spock?" McCoy asked, mentally running though everything Jim ate or drank yesterday. _He can't be having an allergic reaction it would have been noticeable right away. He can't have been kidnapped either, this ship is as safe as ever!_

"Jim is…feeling a minor discomfort," Spock answered, hesitating only slightly.

"Discomfort from what, I can't help if you don't tell me Mr. Spock," McCoy growled, glaring at the intercom, picturing it as the half-Vulcan.

"Damn it Bones! Just get over here or I won't be able to sit during the final negotiations today!" Jim's frustrated voice yelled over the intercom.

"Why-" McCoy started to ask before freezing, his face paling as an image of what Spock and Jim must have done either last night or this morning appeared in his head, causing his eyes to burn. "Damn it Jim! No! They haven't perfected brain beach yet you know!"

"But Bones, I really need-"

"No!" McCoy yelled, cutting the connection falling back onto his bed, hands held over his eyes as he tried to rid his mind of the images. _Damn that kid! I don't need to hear it! _Bones grumbled, a murderous expression on his face as he left his room, heading towards the mess hall.

"Hey Bones, lovely day isn't it?" Jim's happy voice told him as an arm was swung around his shoulders. McCoy froze looking at Jim's happy expression. "Did you miss me Bones, I know I left the party early with Spock but you shouldn't miss me this much!"

"Wha? But you just…how are you here?" McCoy asked, flabbergasted as Jim pulled him forwards, towards the turbo lift. "You were just in your quarters with Spock!"

"What? No I wasn't, have you been drinking this morning without me?"  
Jim asked, looking curiously at Bones, arm still around his shoulders. "But while we are speaking of that sexy Vulcan I have to thank you. If it wasn't for you and the crew I wouldn't be with him now. So thanks."

"No I haven't and it's your own fault you're so blind that you didn't see what was right in front of you," McCoy grumbled as they waited for the turbo lift to arrive, ignoring Jim's hurt expression.

"Dr. McCoy, you should not speak of my T'hy'la in that way," Spock, his voice an angry growl, said, eyes bearing holes into McCoy's head as he pulled Jim away from the Doctor. "If you speak to him that way again I will not hesitate to break your neck."

"Spock I was joking with him, Jim knows that no reason to get so possessive!" McCoy stated, throwing his hands in the air as he stomped into the turbo lift, closing the doors before the two could enter. _They can just wait for the next one, _McCoy thought, glaring at the door as it whirled upwards to the Recreational Deck.

"Oh for the love of Mary and Jesus! I did _not_ need to see that!" McCoy yelled as he stepped out of the turbo lift seeing Spock pressed against the wall, Jim shoving his tongue down his throat as their hands held each other close. Jim rolled his eyes, flipping McCoy off as he went back to kissing his lover passionately.

"Damn Jim always doing things in the worst places," McCoy grumbled as he continued his way towards the Rec. Room, trying to erase what he saw by hitting his head just as the doors opened.

The room was strangely vacant. McCoy glanced around the room hoping to see if someone was in the shadows or hidden away, there was no way that it would be this empty at this time of the morning before his eyes landed in the shadows near the back wall. There sat two individuals, both sitting across from each other near the back of the room.

_How in blue blazes! _McCoy swore staring at Jim and Spock, both calmly conversing with each other, a plate of food in front of both of them. _They were just out there…how hell did they get here before me!_

He slowly walked forwards, collecting his coffee and plain bagel on the way, stomach churning as he saw Jim staring lovingly into Spock's eyes and Spock starring right back, eyes sparkling, his lips twitched upwards slightly in what would be a full blown smile on any human.

"Bones! What took you so long?" Jim asked, waving towards his friend as he broke eye contact with Spock, a huge smile on his face. "We've been waiting forever for you to wake up!"

"Illogical, we have only been waiting for 1.325 hours," Spock replied, their eyes locking together once more before they turned back to McCoy who was standing there shell shocked.

"No! You both were just outside near the turbo lift almost eating each others faces!" McCoy stated, jaw dropping as he saw the looks they passed each other. _It's like goddamn eye sex…Damnit! _

"No…we've been in here the whole time…Are you sure you are feeling okay Bones?" Jim asked, looking worriedly up at his friends before looking back at Spock, expression softening once again. _Oh hell no! _McCoy thought as he dropped his trey and ran out the door into the nearest turbo lift.

"What the hell is happening here? There is no way they could have beat me there….and where are the rest of the crew!" McCoy yelled, slamming his fist against the wall as the lift opened, dropping him off in Sickbay.

"Dr. McCoy, I…require your assistance in a matter of much importance," Spock said, standing just outside of Sickbays doors.

"No! I am not giving you any advice you green blooded walking computer! Unless someone is dying I don't want to be disturbed!" McCoy yelled, his patience running dry as he glared up at this Spock.

"Dr. McCoy! You know better then to call Spock that! He is a living person just like you and me he isn't a computer!" Jim yelled, appearing at Spock's side, his arm wrapped lightly around Spock's waste, his blue eyes darkening as he glared at his friend.

"Whatever! I got paperwork to complete!" McCoy growled, glaring at the two before he stomped into sickbay, orders ready for Nurse Chapel when he was greeted with an empty room. "What the…where is everyone?" McCoy glanced around the room, all the computers were running and it was 0800 hours, at least five nurses should be on duty by now.

"Ugh Spock…faster…go faster," Jim's voice moaned.

McCoy froze in his tracks, eyes traveling towards his office room door. _No…Jim wouldn't dare, _McCoy thought, quietly walking closer to his door the moans becoming louder and louder.

"Jim…Jim," Spock voice moaned, the sounds of wood creaking echoing in McCoy's ears.

"Oh fuck _no!_" McCoy thundered, his door sliding open. Cloths were spread across the office floor, obviously left where the two had discarded them. A Starfleet issued boot laying limp right besides the door. McCoy's eyes scanned the room, landing on his desk. Jim was bending over the desk as Spock stood behind him, thrusting into Jim as they both moaned each others name.

"My eyes are you both trying to kill me! In my office not to mention my desk! What the hell!" McCoy yelled a murderous expression on his face as he watched Jim and Spock turn to look at him before the world when black.

"Damn it! Damn-damn…Damn Spirk!" McCoy yelled, shooting up in bed, a hypospray locked in his hands, the murderous expression still on his face as he scanned the room. Looking for any sign of Spock or Jim within his vicinity so he could stab them.

McCoy ran out of his room, looking down the hallway, crewmembers jumping to get out of his way. First he checked the hallway near his room before jumping into the turbo lift, shoving two ensigns out, ordering the lift to take him to the Rec room. As the doors opened McCoy peered murderously at the wall where he had seen Jim and Spock kissing. Seeing that the wall was clear he stomped into the Rec. room, everyone freezing as the doctor scanned the crowd, looking for any sign of Jim or Spock.

"Lenard, u lookin' fer someone?" Scotty asked, walking up to McCoy a sandwich in his hands.

"Have you seen our Captain or Commander yet?" McCoy asked, knuckles white from where he was gripping the hypo.

"No, ah don thik they hav left the Cap'ns roms yet," Scotty said, confused as McCoy ran out of the room, hypo held dangerously in front of him as he headed towards the Captain's room.

_Just wait till I get ahold of Jim. I bet it was all his idea! It always is!_ McCoy thought, glaring at the door as he quickly used his medical overdrive to open it. Stomping inside seeing Spock and Jim, fully clothed thankfully, wrapped in each other's arms, a phaser resting by Jim's right hand.

"YOU! How could you! It's my office and how the hell did you get back here!" McCoy yelled, jamming the hypo in Jim's face, ignoring Spock's glare.

"I do not understand you doctor. We have only just awakened ourselves," Spock said, slowly pulling Jim closer to him and away from the angry doctor.

"Lies! You were all over the ship! Hell you were in my officer and everyone else was gone! It was like a nightmare with only you two on this ship!" McCoy growled, waving the hypo in the air as he continued to glare at the pair.

"Bones, we haven't left this room yet," Jim said, reaching out, slowly lowering his friends arm. McCoy paused; looking at Jim's pale drawn face, there was no way the kid was lying right now. He looked like he had just seen a ghost. _Or Nero_, he thought.

"Then what the hell happened! It was so real," McCoy asked, his grip on the hypo tightening once again.

"I do not know," Spock said, eyes never leaving the hypo, making sure it stayed far enough away from Jim.

"Whatever, I'm going to go to work. I got a lot of paperwork to go though," McCoy sighed, shoving the hypo back in his pocket.

"Alright," Jim said, smiling slightly before calling up. "Hey Bones…thanks. For last night."

"No problem kid," McCoy said, a small smile spreading across his face as he exited the room. Leaving the new lovers alone. The crew sighed in relief as a much calm McCoy made his way though the halls towards Sickbay, the murderous expression gone. _ I have a feeling Jim and Spock know more then they are telling me. They know something…_ McCoy thought as he greeted Chapel before entering his office, freezing just within his doorway.

"What are you three doing here?" McCoy growled, unwilling to deal with them so soon after that…dream?

"Just checking up on you," Aki said calmly, swinging his feet back and forth from his seat on the desk.

"Why, I'm the doctor here! I should be the one doing the checkups!"

"You might be the doctor but you don't know anything about what happened to you," Terry said from his spot near the wall, watching McCoy carefully.

"You see," Kallista said, smiling brightly from her spot in McCoy's chair. "We just figured you would also have a nightmare just like Jimmy did. We just came to see if you were okay."

"How did you know Jim had a nightmare," McCoy asked, eyes narrowing as he took in the three. "And how is this related to the fact that I had a nightmare?"

"We were there earlier this morning. He almost killed us with his emergency phaser! As for your question…well you see," Aki said, trailing off, looking to Terry and Kallista for help.

"When we were little we developed a potion. It makes people act to whatever the suggestion is. We used this little think last night during the party and this time it was James's song…You Belong to Me. And well…" Terry said, looking over at Kallista to explain the rest.

"What Terry is trying to say is that we stabbed you as well, you might not remember just another side effect of the potion the other is. Well you have nightmares, usually your worst fear. Only happens to humans though, not half-humans are aliens."

"So your saying I had that dream…because of you three," McCoy said, deathly calm.

"Pretty much," the three said, exchanging looks, wondering about McCoy's calm appearance.

"I am going to murder you!" McCoy yelled, pulling out a super hypospray, as large as the one that Jim had seen during his drunken haze during Just Can't Wait to be Captain. He charged forwards, stabbing the hypo at the three as they jumped to their feet, running for the door.

"We never get a break do we?" Terry yelled, as they ran thought sickbay and out into the halls.

"Nope!" Kallista yelled, dodging a carefully aimed hypo.

"The things we do for Jim!" Aki yelled as they continued to run down the hallway.

"Get back here you three!" McCoy yelled, the hypo held above his head as he ran after them, crewmembers jumping aside to avoid McCoy's wrath. Standing and watching as they disappeared down a hallway, their screams still heard hours later.

**T'Slash: **Hahah that was even more fun then I thought it would be! Longer too! Kallista, Aki and Terry never get a break, lol. I wasn't sure I would be able to finish this, I am half asleep right now but thanks to Terry and this story itself I did and it turned out awesome! Well I am going to go pass out now its 0310 but please don't forget to review and tell me what you thought of this!


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